MEMORIAL DAY AND ITS OBSERVANCES

By Rabbi Niles E. Goldstein

Memorial Day in Israel (or Yom Ha-Zikaron) is a very different experience from its standard expressions here. In the United States, how many of us actually rememeber and honor those who gave their lives for our country? Most of us go to our weekend homes, take trips, or do household chores. In a way, it's a very sad statement about American narcisissm. Our sole focus is usually on ourselves.

In Israel, loud sirens (which sound like the single tekiah blast from the ram's horn) bellow throughout the country. People stop whatever they are doing and pause for a moment of silence. Cars pull over on roads and even highways; men and women stop walking on the streets and stand in stillness until the siren ends. It is one of the most powerful experiences I have ever had, and we Jews--for whom memory plays such an important role in our communal and religious lives--ought to be more attentive and respectful and grateful on our own day of rememberance here. Memorial Day isn't about politics--it's about people, people who have made the ultimate sacrifice. For us and our children. So let's try to honor them in a way that is fitting.

FINISHING UP STRONG

By Rabbi Niles E. Goldstein

The best coaches and instructors always tell their players or practioners to"finish strong." But in the Jewish world, year after year, we always finish very weak. In the fall, Jews flock to their various synagogues for the High Holy Days, people pray together, friends and acquaintances catch up, and then, for the most part, there is a slow and steady decline. Sure, we have some other holidays and festivals when Jews come together, like Sukkot, Chanukah, and Purim, but by late spring, when the festival of Shavuot comes along, virtually everybody is already planning for the summer and nowhere to be found.

Shavuot ought to be an ecstatic moment, since it marks the establishment of the Sacred Covenant at Mount Sinai between God and the Jewish people. It should be the climax of the year. Yet in most communities and congregations, attendance is sparse and understanding of the holiday is limited. I think we need to recapture that ecstatic spirit again, to end the year strong instead of lethargic. Who would ever win a race with that approach? And the Jewish calendar cycle IS a race, a race to redeem and heal a broken world. The day is short, the ancient sages say, but our task is great.

BEYOND SEX, DRUGS, AND ROCK 'N ROLL

By Rabbi Niles E. Goldstein

Sex, drugs, rock 'n roll. . .and religion?? Who would ever associate these activities together? Most of us these days think that so-called "organized religion" is unsophisticated, uncool, closed minded. But I would argue, from my own experience, that just the OPPOSITE is actually the case. At its best, religion doesn't close doors, it opens them; it doesn't make life dull and boring, but exciting and adventurous. I just led a group of teens, for example, on a rock climbing trip in the Gunks--utilizing some of the core principles and teachings of the Jewish religion as our organizing framework (e.g., the values of taking individual initiative, interdependence, teamwork, confronting our fears, and other vital and ancient Jewish values).

We had a great time, and while we learned about ourselves, we also learned about Judaism. If we are open-minded about it, adults can have a similar experience. So let's take religion out of our houses of worship and classrooms when we need to. Let's place it place it on mountaintops, in pubs, on horseback trips, in the public square. For me, religion offers the greatest of adventures, the highest of challenges. The question you need to ask yourself is, are you up to them? More importantly, are you OPEN to them? Forget the extremists and the fanatics--take a look at your kid's smiling face as he or she descends the rockface and starts quoting lines from Hillel to you.

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TAKE SOME DAMN RESPONSIBILITY, FOR GOD'S SAKE

By Rabbi Niles E. Goldstein

As of this writing, the majority of Israelis are demanding that Ehud Olmert resign for his incompetence in the war against Lebanon. We'll know soon enough whether he does or not. But is he capable, at least, of admitting his mistakes? How many of us really are? There's a world of difference between saying, as another world leader once said, "Mistakes were made," and saying "I made a mistake." The people I respect the most always fall into the latter camp. They are always the most secure. They are the ones who possess the courage that too many of us, leaders and laypersons alike, lack. Most of us are insecure. Most of us feel that by admitting "I screwed up," we have somehow failed as human beings. But screwing up is precisely what MAKES us human beings!Why have Yom Kippur if people didn't inevitably make mistakes, year after year after year?

Atonement is only possible after honest acknowledgment. Yet the older I get, the more I observe that in the workplace, in our private lives, and in most our interpersonal relationships, we'd rather blame others for problems. I know it's not easy to reach the level of emotional maturity and psychological security in order to take responsibility for our errors. But for God's sake, let's work harder at it, and come to realize that when we have a "miscommunication" or "misunderstanding" with someone else, it's always a two-way street. And when a "mistake is made," more likely than not we played a role in it.